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Sunday, June 03, 2007

A PROM OF THEIR OWN

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posted by Bob at Sunday, June 03, 2007

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A prom of their own
The state's first prom for young Muslim women gave participants a chance to experience an American rite of passage - without making cultural compromises.
BY LIALA HELAL
Pioneer Press
Article Last Updated: 06/03/2007 11:24:42 AM CDT


Farha Bachani, left, puts lip gloss on her cousin Saima Bachani on Saturday at the University of Minnesota's Coffman Memorial Union before a prom for young Muslim women. The event allowed Muslim girls, who aren't allowed to dance with boys or wear revealing dresses, to enjoy a teen rite of passage. (JEAN PIERI, Pioneer Press)More than 100 Muslim teen girls let their hair down Saturday night. Both literally and figuratively. Muslim girls who wear the headscarf in public slid them off as they walked into the first Minnesota Muslim prom exclusively for girls and women. With no men there, they didn't have to cover up and were free to let loose and dance.

"I'd hate to miss this," said Sabrina Wazwaz, 15, a freshman who goes to Twin Cities Academy in St. Paul. "I think it's really nice how they thought of the Muslim girls who can't go to the American prom, so they made this for us."

The event was called PROM, an acronym which stands for Party foR Only Muslimahs, or Muslim girls, and was held in accordance with Islamic culture and values. Many Muslim girls don't go to their high school prom for cultural reasons: They aren't allowed to dance with the opposite sex, and prom dresses can be too revealing for some Muslim girls to wear in public. As an alternative, the event, held at the University of Minnesota's Coffman Memorial Union, allowed participants to dance, wear what they wanted and not feel like they missed out on a staple of the high school experience.

"I thought it was an awesome idea," said Sagirah Shahid, one of the main organizers and president of the Muslim Youth of Minnesota. Shahid, 18, is a senior at Roosevelt High School in Minneapolis. "We want to encourage Muslimahs to have fun but not do anything they're not supposed to. It's a positive alternative to the real prom."

The event included dinner, performances by attendees during a talent show, a fashion show of clothing from different cultures and dancing.

Girls dressed in sparkly gowns admired one another's dresses as they dipped strawberries in a chocolate fountain and drank punch.

Wazwaz wore an ethnic hip scarf that jingled when she moved her hips. She, along with Muslim girls from all over the Twin Cities, smiled and laughed beneath glowing red lights and candles, surrounded by the gold, black and red colors of China that went with the event's theme: "A night in China."

The theme was chosen because it was "different and unique, something that's never been done before," said Fathya Jeylani, a student at the University of Minnesota.

Wazwaz, who performed a Palestinian belly dance during the talent show, said it's hard for her to explain to her friends at school why she's not going to the high school prom.

"Some people don't understand Islam," she said. "They just think, 'Oh, her parents are strict, so she can't do anything,' but it's really the opposite. We can do stuff, but it's just the non-Islamic stuff that we can't do."

The event was organized by Muslim Youth of Minnesota and co-sponsored by the University of Minnesota's Al-Madinah Cultural Center.

One of the organizers, Mallerie Shirley, 20, whose mother converted to Islam 10 years ago, said she was surprised at the positive response they got from the community when advertising for the event because generally "there's a negative connotation about prom in the Muslim community," she said.

But now, all that has changed.

Shirley expected some girls to think the idea was "lame," but found the opposite to be true.

"The cultural norms for this prom is different. Nobody expects you to have a date; nobody expects you to drink afterward. It's prom that's been plugged into the Muslim converter," Shirley said.

The event brought together girls and women from all segments of the Muslim community, including Somali, Kenyan, Indian, Pakistani, Malaysian, Sudanese, Lebanese, Palestinian, Jordanian, Egyptian, Moroccan, African-American and Caucasian-American participants. The event was open to girls ages 12 and older, and to women.

"It's more like a community prom of all different cultures and ages," said Susan Samaha, 23, who didn't go to her high school prom because she didn't feel like she'd have a good time. "I was super excited when I first heard about it. This is basically all the fun stuff about prom without any of the negative stuff. It's just good, innocent, girl fun."

She said regular prom is based on dating, which is prohibited in Islamic culture.

"I personally think you can have a much better time without guys because you can just let loose and do whatever you want," said Amina Ghouse, a youth group adviser.

The organizers plan on having this event annually and next year hope to have it closer to prom season, at the end of April or early May, so it can be an option for girls who don't feel comfortable attending their high school proms.

"We don't want the girls to feel like they're missing out on the fun of prom," Shahid said. "Prom is like a rite of passage for some people."

American Muslim girls often have to come up with creative ways to take the most important values of their two cultures - Islamic and American - and find a middle ground.

"A lot of times, Muslim girls' fun is limited," Shahid said.

"What we have in common with every other girl is that we just want to feel pretty, be girly and have fun," she said. "We want an excuse to dress like a princess."

Liala Helal can be reached at lhelal@pioneerpress.com or 651-228-2173.

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