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Thursday, December 14, 2006

The Ant Story

Here is another great email from one of our regular members to this TOWN HAll meeting. Thought I better share it with everyone.

The ant story

Classic Version:
The ant works hard in the withering heat all summer long, building his house and laying up supplies for the winter.

The grasshopper thinks he..s a fool and laughs and dances and plays the summer away.

Come winter, the ant is warm and well fed. The grasshopper has no food or shelter so he dies out in the cold.

Modern Version:
The ant works hard in the withering summer heat all summer long, building his house and laying up supplies for the winter. The grasshopper thinks he..s a fool and laughs and dances and plays the summer away.
Come winter, the shivering grasshopper calls a press conference and demands to know why the ant should be allowed to be warm and well fed while others are cold and starving.

CBS, NBC, and ABC show up to provide pictures of the shivering grasshopper next to a video of the ant in his comfortable home with a table filled with food.

America is stunned by the contrast. How can this be, that in a country of such great wealth, this poor grasshopper is allowed to suffer so?

Kermit the Frog appears on Oprah with the grasshopper, and everybody cries when they sing, ..It..s Not Easy Being Green...

Jesse Jackson stages a demonstration in front on the ants home where the news stations film the group singing ..We Shall Overcome... Jesse then has the group kneel down to pray to God for the grasshopper..s sake.

Al Gore exclaims in an interview with Peter Jennings that the ant has gotten rich off the back of the grasshopper, and calls for an immediate tax hike on the ant to make him pay his ..fair share...

Finally, the EEOC drafts the ..Economic Equity and Anti-Grasshopper Act.., retroactive to the beginning of the summer.

The ant is fined for failing to hire a proportionate number of greenbugs and, having nothing left to pay his retroactive taxes, his home is confiscated by the government.

Hillary gets her old law firm to represent the grasshopper in a defamation suit against the ant, and the case is tried before a panel of federal judges that Bill appointed from a list of single-parent welfare recipients. The ant loses the case.

The story ends when we see the grasshopper finishing the last bits of the ant..s food while the government house he is in, which just happens to be the ant..s old house, crumbles around him because he doesn..t maintain it.

The ant has disappeared in the snow.

The grasshopper is found dead in a drug related incident and the house, now abandoned, is taken over by a gang of spiders who terrorize the once peaceful neighborhood.

Work Harder millions of grasshoppers are depending on you

2 Comments:

Anonymous Anonymous said...

I feel like a small little brown ant today. My little arms and legs hurt carrying grains of sand that would have provided a safe and financially sound environment for my ant family. Then one day a big slimy green grasshopper driving around in "the city of large green bugs rule" car came by and squashed my ant hill.

12:22 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

The ants going marching onebyone, hurrah, hurrah, the ants going marching onebyone, hurrah, hurrah they're all enroute to file suit and they all come marching down on the town to disturb the nasty green bugs. boom, boom, boom.

10:46 AM  

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